Problems give meaning to LIFE by John Maxwell

A wise philosopher once commented that an eagle's only obstacle toovercome for flying with greater speed and ease is the air. Yet, if theair were withdrawn and the proud bird were to fly in a vacuum, it wouldfall instantly to the ground, unable to fly at all. The very element thatoffers resistance to flying is at the same time the condition for flight.The main obstacle that a powerboat has to overcome is the wateragainst the propeller, yet, if it were not for this same resistance, theboatwould not move at all.

The same law, that obstacles are conditions of success, holds true inhuman life. A life free of all obstacles and difficulties would reduce allpossibilities and powers to zero. Eliminate problems, and life loses itscreativetension. The problem of mass ignorance gives meaning to education.The problem of ill health gives meaning to medicine. The problem of social disorder gives meaning to government.

We all have a tendency all of our lives to want to get rid of problems and responsibilities.

When that temptation arises, remember the youth who was questioning a lonely old man. "What is life's heaviest burden?"he asked. The old fellow answered sadly, "Having nothing to carry."

Allow your problems to motivate you toward greater creativity and strength.

"The one that got away"

"Perfectly stated. Could not say more"

In your life, you'll make note of a lot of people. Ones with whom you shared something special, ones who will always mean something. There's the one you first kissed, the one you first loved, the one you lost your virginity to, the one you put on a pedestal, the one you're with...and the one that got away.

Who is the one that got away? I guess it's that person with whom everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong.

There was no fault in the person, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just didn't fall the right way, I suppose.

I believe in the fact that ending up with someone, finding a longtime partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with the matter of timing. It has to do with you being ready to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyond the little niceties of giddy romance.

How often have you gone through it without even realizing it? When you're not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn't matter who you're with, it just doesn't work. Small problems become big; inconsequential become deal breakers simply because you're not ready and it shows. It's not that you and the person you're with are no good; it's just that it's not yet right, and little things become the flashpoint of that fact.

Then one day you're ready. You really are. And when this happens, you'll be ready to settle down with someone. He or she may not be the most perfect, they might not be the brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your life, but it'll work because you're ready. It'll work because it's the right time and you'll make it work. And it'll make sense, it really will.

So that day comes when you're finally making sense of things, and you find yourself to be a different person. Things are different, your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and what you want, and you've become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind you, there's no telling when this day will come. Hopefully you're single but you could be in a long-term relationship, you could be married with three kids, it doesn't matter. All you know is that you've changed, and for some reason, the one that got away, is the first person you think about.

You'll think about them because you'll wonder, "What if they were here today?" You'll wonder, "What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?" That's what the one that got away is. The biggest "What if?" you'll have in your life.

If you're married, you'll just have to accept the fact that the one That got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think your marriage is, this can happen to the best of us. But hopefully you're mature enough to realize that you're already with the one you're with and this is just another test of your commitment, one which will just strengthen your marriage when you get past it. Sure, you'll think about him/her every so often, but it's alright. It's never nice to live with a "might have been," but it happens.

Maybe the one that got away is the one who's already married. In which case it's the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice little smile to your lips in the future when you're old and gray and reminiscing. But if neither of that is the case, then it's different. What do you do if it's not yet too late? Simple...find him, find her. Because the very existence of a "one that got away" means that you'll always wonder, what if you got that one?

Ask him out to coffee, ask her out to a movie, it doesn't matter if you've dropped in from out of nowhere. You'd be surprised, you just might be "the one that got away" as well for the person who is your "the one that got away." You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won't make a difference. If the timing is finally right, it'll all just fall into place somehow.

And you know, I'm thinking, it would be a great feeling, in the end,to be able to say to someone, "Hey you, you're the one that almost got away"

2009 Algebraic Formula: More of addition, Less in Subtraction

My Chinese year has already started. My fortune this year says i'd be lucky most of the time with work and love though i'd be threatened by the Spending Star and avoid going to funerals so as to avoid catching negative energies.

It felt good after reading this, its all about saying that 2009 will be a good one for me. Though it makes me think if i should really believe my destiny declared by the moon and stars. It wouldnt hurt, i said to myself. That is because i'd like to think and hope that 2009 will bring me closer to where i want myself to be. It started from there. Next thing i knew, i was already downloading the documentary of the book, The Secret. All about having the positive vibes, law of attraction.

For the past years, in all honesty, i wanted to stop adding one more year everytime i celebrate my birthday. I'd be all jollly and enthusiastic during the day with the people i love, but when the day ends, when im alone, thats the time i'd feel anxious about growing another year older. Gladly, this year was different, because it was my decision to view the event on a different perspective. Oh yes, im am now 29, BUT i dont look and feel like i am one. Hahah. I am not in denial though, but that is what i feel and others see in me. When a friend of mine greeted me and then asked how old i am....my answer was, "29 na, tanda na noh." He answered, "nyak, you are just a year older than me, and look at where i still am now..." Then i answered back, "same here" Then i decided not to dwell on the negative topic anymore by shifting the paradigm, " You know what, we cant really have it all. You should be happy and you should consider yourself lucky. I could say i am happy now, because i choose to be in such a positive disposition. I do not want to focus on the things i do not have, but spend more time with those that i am blessed with." My friend answered, "Tama ka jan, oo nga noh." Funny, he probably realized that the only thing he wanted is what i possess, and what i have been wishing for is where is he is lucky at. So then he clearly got my point without me elaborating it further.

The greatest gift i got on my birthday this year is that I finally learned to value whatever life has thrown at me for the past 29 years. I looked around and saw the people who are loving me, i am one of the luckiest people to have numerous sincere people appreciating my existence. I instantly felt so special. I have the bestest friends, coolest officemates that i could consider as my extended family, a uberly handsome boss (hahaha!) and loving family that have always been there for me ALL THE TIME. Am i the luckiest? :) Yes i am. The tangible things are just temporary, but those that touch me the most are the people that chose to stay.

I am so looking forward to the new faces and new relationships that i'd be having for the gift of another year to live. Then i could say again for the next year, that i am once more the luckiest.

Thanks to all who extended their greetings. You made it all special this year :) Cheers!

How to live a worry free life. Read on.

A beautiful reminder for us all.

An Angel says, 'Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain.. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice.'

1. Pray
2. Go to bed on time.
3. Get up on time so you can start the day unrushed.
4. Say No to projects that won't fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health.
5. Delegate tasks to capable others.
6. Simplify and unclutter your life...
7. Less is more. (Although one is often not enough, two are often too many.)
8. Allow extra time to do things and to get to places.
9. Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don't lump the hard things all together.
10... Take one day at a time.
11. Separate worries from concerns ... If a situation is a concern, find out what God would have you do and let go of the anxiety . If you can't do anything about a situation, forget it.
12. Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases.
13.. Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc.
14. K.M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble.
15. Do something for the Kid in You everyday.
16. Carry a Bible with you to read while waiting in line.
17. Get enough rest.
18. Eat right.
19 Get organized so everything has its place.
20. Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life.
21. Write down thoughts and inspirations.
22. Every day, find time to be alone.
23. Having problems? Talk to God on the spot. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don't wait until it's time to go to bed to try and pray.
24. Make friends with Godly people.
25. Keep a folder of favorite scriptures on hand.
26. Remember that the shortest bridge between despair and hope is often a good 'Thank you Jesus .'
27. Laugh.
28. Laugh some more!
29. Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all.
30. Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can).
31. Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most).
32. Sit on your ego.
33 Talk less; listen more.
34. Slow down.
35. Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe.
36 Every night before bed, think of one thing you're grateful for that you've never been grateful for before.

2008: Finding my niche

I decided to create a post mortem of my 2008 here at my blogspot coz i would like to think this is a more discreet way of my expression and i wouldnt have to be embarassed if anyone sees this.

I wouldnt want to say that i was lost for 2008, but a better way to describe it, as what my friend said, it was a whole process of finding my niche. I spent most of my time in my inner circle, and more quiet moments with myself trying to figure out what i want most for my life. Uncertainty had hit me and i myself didnt know where i should stand. I have forced myself into situations where i thought could lead me to my true happiness. I took a lot of risks and assumptions, now im thankful that 2009 had just led me to the answer, right on its very first day. I was given the chance to start the year right. Now i dont want to waste it once more, and i am determined to make the most out of the 362 days (since its already Jan 3) left. You go girl!

I have also made another realization for the past year, which i still dont know if i will be effective on this. I started to emerge myself into the community. Last April, i played the role of being the Executive Producer of our in house Jesus Christ Superstar play. I dealt with different kinds of people, from fags to politicians and all. Hahaha. Surely, it gave me a taste of the real world outside my house. 27 years of my life, i was hibernating from the community. Now that i was kinda exposed, i was a target of intrigue and all eyes were on me. Yuck, as if, showbiz. I met new friends, which i didnt really think i could be close with. Another challenge has been given to me, this time around it involves the Church. How could i refuse. Though i felt i am not worthy, i decided to take part in this new responsibility. Im with the group of young professional, from city councilors, attorneys, teachers, doctors from highly reputable fields. Our task is to raise 3.5-7 million moolah for the reconstruction of our dear parish. Not an easy task though, but im willing to help for as long as i could. Lately, i heard some tease me of running for politics, which is waaayy waaayyy far from my ambition. I have also involved myself into several outreach activities from Gawad Kalinga, Sibol, and the abandoned kids of Gen Trias Cavite. The rewarding feeling was unexplainable. This is one of the many things i want to continue doing for the coming years. My friends were quite shocked when i told them all of the social/civic/community work that i do. For awhile they got worried, hahaha, and even asked me to stop pretending. I know i know ok, i am but a sinner and crazy at times, but deeper inside of me, i have this soft spot for people. I am a people person, being around them and helping them within my reach makes me a better person.

I started my new hobby early this year, i got so interested and later on addicted to Photography. It took many years to discover this side of me. I didnt know i have this talent. Last april, i got my first DSLR then i wasnt satisfied then upgraded to a new model just this december. This new hobby helped me stay away from my old past time of hanging out with two bottles. Hahaha. Now i cant sleep without tinkering my camera and laptop for the photos. A fruitful and healthy alternative indeed. I had many chances of travelling this year, though i wasnt able to fly abroad, this i will do many time this year. hahaha. Photography tags along travelling as my leisure. I got to love the beauty of nature, and i no longer hate the beach, it served as my refuge for countless times.

As for my career, this is not really my year. Though early on i got my promotion, and i bought my first brand new car, i felt i can do more. I'd have to make up this year. i fell in love with telecommunications and sales, will stick with it until time permits. Later on, if opportunity knocks, i'd venture my career on another land. Where? i still dont know. On the side of my career life, i got into this small business. I became a bag designer. I got to realize that im good at this, selling and designing bags. Earnings was great specially this Christmas and i plan to continue flourishing the business again, for as long as i could.

I had many many realizations this year and i got to discover things that im good at. My decision is to dwell on this positive and productive activities for the coming year. As for my personal life, i am now opening myself up for new relationships. Haha. Those that i rejected, can now go back, hehehe. Whether it may be romantic or of any sort. I have learned that we can make ourselves more resilient to pain if we build more on friendships. This ive got to do. Lastly, i need to go back to my physical activities. Probably go back to boxing or enrol in a new gym (my third already!) and meet new hmmm friends there :) It would surely be fun broadening my horizons. So, wish me luck.

This year i hope to find my place... in all aspects.

Happy new year to all! Wishing you more blessings and loving for 2009.

Much love,
Elgin

an unexpected bliss

Happy New Year to all.

When i think about what i did last night i cant help but have a sly grin on my face. I did something that i know is right, but quite foolish i must say. At some point in our lives, we have to go certain things that later in the end, you'd realize that you just made a big fool out of yourself. I am thankful that at that instant i decided to blurt out what i have been keeping for the longest time. It made me look stupid and pathetic (sorry i just had to confess it, though i really think i was!) but when i woke up today, surprisingly i felt so relieved. Its as if i have loaded off a baggage that i have been carrying so uselessly. What a way to start the year, hahaha. Then again, i had to be a fool. But i got what i needed, not what i wanted. Though the result was not what i have been hoping for, as i said, i am surprised that it felt right. Maybe because i was just in some sort of denial, and somewhat expecting the exact result. The truth just had to be confirmed and confronted. It had to slapped onto my face before i see the light. Hahaha. Now i am seeing it. Thank goodness. That's all i have to say, still again with a smile on my face :)

Wishing everybody a prosperous and less-foolish year ahead! Cheers!

happy holidays

Why is it that the thing you want most is the one thing you cant have?